I had a job interview several weeks ago. I won’t name the employeer. It’s a contract gig, so technically they would be my client.
I had two seperate interview’s with two different groups of people.
Both went well. However, after the second interview with all men, I had the following conversation went with the recruiter.
Recruiter: “Sharay, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first?”
Me: “I don’t care, either is fine in this case.”
Recruiter: “Ok, well the good news, they want to bring you on board. The bad news is that you will need to buy a new wardrobe.”
Me: “That’s great, but why the new wardrobe?”
Recruiter: “Well the only issue they had was that they thought your dress was a little to revealing.”
Me in my head: “You have got to be kidding me?”
A little background.
I have big boobs. I have since I was thirteen. It’s not something I like. It has caused me great emotional and physical discomfort. The physical, especially. So much so, that I was granted a medical reduction almost two years ago. My back was much happier afterwards and so was I.
Then I found out I was pregnant. My boob’s grew.
Thankfully they are still smaller then they were.
Dealing with my chest has always been something that I have had to have a bit of a sense of humor about. I did ok with that most of the time. Occasionally, I would lash out at “them.” Typically this was in a dressing room when something fit everywhere else but my chest.
They are sort of “characters” to me. I don’t think of them as objects for leverage in an interview.
When I was preparing for said interview with extremely conservative clients, I made a very concerted effort to add safety pins to my dress so there wouldn’t be any issue with my “girls.” So when I heard the response from the recruiter about my “revealing” dress, I was pretty damn irritated because:
A. The only thing showing was a little bit of skin over my sternum.
B. Because the group that commented consisted of all men.
I have had several calls with the recruiter over the past few weeks and every single time I am reminded about the ridiculous dress code.
I received another call the other day from the recruiter asking if I could meet with the manager of the woman who I would report to. I said “Of course.”
The recruiter was asked by the account manager to make sure someone had spoken to me about the dress code.
At this point I was disgusted.
I asked why this subject kept getting brought up. My dress was appropriate and would fit in with the guidelines that were sent to me.
The recruiter flat out responded by saying, “Sharay, do you want to know why this keeps coming up? It’s because you are attractive.”
OM bleepity, bleeping HELL!
I have been stewing about this for days.
First of all. Why do I as a woman get made out to be some kind of villainous temptress because this particular group of man can’t possibly be around a woman who looks like a woman?
Secondly, why are we so ashamed of bodies?
I am certainly not saying let me walk around with my cleavage handing out, but with this topic constantly being brought up, I feel like I should be ashamed because of the way I look.
Thankfully, I am to ticked off to succumb to this puritan mindset.
But, I am in a bit a conundrum.
I am infuriated by this constant demonstration of ultra conservatistim, controlling mentality that is part of the culture of this employer/client. Apparently my skills have taken a back seat to my chest. Something that has ALWAYS plagued me.
However, this would be a great opportunity to expand my skills and work with someone who I have worked with in the past and hugely respect.
To bad the place isn’t filled with guys like him. Much more progressive.
I don’t want to go into this with a chip on my shoulder, but how can I not?
I am almost to the point where I just want to walk because I am so annoyed by this situation.
What to do???